Time slips like water

on my hands spilling.

Each droplet has formed

river; ground has robbed

my throat chokes of thirst.

A loss before me.

My mouth, my heart, muted.

My eyes left tear-less.

Only because I...

let it all spill away.

My hands now dripping

"tears" none can ever feel.

My love, my soul, lost.

on this desert, life.

I look back, I sigh.

The void consumes me.

I tried to cry once more.

Still, no tears would flow.

If only it can quench this thirst.

A poem about a time lost. Written in 2008 most probably while procrastinating for something important. :)

im working as a call center agent.. every now and then, there are calls that makes me upset..

CUSTOMER: hello.. its freaking thanksgiving and my services had been disconnected.. u are aware that its thanksgiving,ryt? no one disc services on a holiday..its freaking stupid

CSR: Im so sorry to hear that your services were disconnected. After careful review, I see that you have a past due balance of $XX.XX that trigger the interruption of your service. We will need to accept full payment to reactivate service,

CUSTOMER: dont you know its thanksgiving.. its freaking thanksgiving..

CSR: i know ma'am

CUSTOMER: so turn my services back on..its freaking holiday..

CSR: I'm sorry but i wudnt be able to do that without full payment

CUSTOMER: then transfer me to someone hu can.. and to an american hu speaks english!!!!!

CSR: ok..

(transferring to the automated CSR -aba american kaya un)

I'm going to take a deep breath and let all the negative vibes out. As far as my bullcrap intolerant self goes, I'm sure I can be logical about the whole situation. And for the record, I cannot hate you. I...love you more than my pride. Ok, so you were exchanging emails with this Lauren shi*, excuse me, and you emailed her first asking how is she. Uhm, hello? I was hospitalized for 2 weeks last month and did you send me an email? No? Yeah, I thought so too. But it's ok, I understand, you were so busy with school and the restaurant that time right, sweetie?

Next, your email was dated 11/22/09, 11:24am, wow. I thought you teach from 8-12 and you have no breaks because you wanted to maximize your teaching time so you could improve your R-filled english as well?  (Note: he's japanese and they don't have the letter L in their alphabet). So, do you teach your students how to send emails too? How generous. You should have a raise then dear, for going an extra mile. Just make sure that your head teacher won't catch you on ym ok?..

And 3rd, you were talking about a party. And how did this Lauren shi*, excuse me, turned out to be sooo important that you felt so "alone" that time when she did not come? She your new nanny or something? Does she give you those massages now and fills your drink with lots of ice because you like it super cold? And a party?? You? You got so mad at me when I attended my soiree, (and I just sang one song!) because according to you, parties are not necessary anymore because it's for single people who wants to find a date. And I thought you hate crowds? Oh I get it. You and Lauren will just sit on a corner and be by yourselves to avoid everyone else, because you're claustrophobic. Wait. How silly of me. Maybe she's claustrophobic too!

Mahal, I am so sorry. I shouldn't have doubted you..You are so....sensitive.. I feel so stupid for accusing you of anything. And please don't hate me for reading your emails, and feel free to delete those guys on my facebook again if they make you jealous. I'm sorry. And and tell Lauren shi*, excuse me, that I'm sorry too. Tell her I said hi ok?

So there.

After all we have been through, I can only look at you, through the eyes you lied to..

Damn it hurts. Should I be alarmed? Is this paranoia? I've been waiting for 3 days. I checked your email and you've been replying to her, everyday. What's up with that? No one's forcing you to stay. I lived for 20  years without you and I'm so certain I can still live the rest of my life, (though heavily broken) with one less of a liar in it. Just don't take me for a fool. I've never been one. Or maybe I will be, soon, for giving you all of me.

mushygrey24

Bok2x:    Hi Bez, Kamusta ka na?

Poknat:    (Inunahan na nya bago pa magtanong about his anticipated date) Uhm, I'm okay po.. Bez bout dun sa reto-reto hmmm wala pa talaga eh...

Bok2x:    Ay ganun ba I was about to ask you kung may date na ako...

Poknat:    Sorry talaga ah.

Bok2x:    Hmmmm... Wala na talaga.. Alam mo si Lala di na nagpaparamdam. Iniwan niya na talaga ako.

              (Si Lala ay ang kanyang niligawan, Si Lala ang binigyan nya ng surprise birthday gift ng bonggang bongga pero not appreciated.)

Poknat:    Move-on bez, It's better for you not to think the pain para di masyadong mag-sink in.

Bok2x:    Eh kaya nga naghahanap ako ng date eh. My tanong ako sayo. I hope you'll answer this.

Poknat:    I'll try my best. Go.

Bok2x:     Am I not that attractive?

Poknat:    Bez you have these good qualities and all that. And I'm sure you'll someday catch a better fish in the ocean.

Bok2x:     I don't wanna fish if the fish will find its way just to escape from my trap.

Poknat:     See, you are planning to trap not to attract.

Bok2x:     Kasi I know I'm so pangit kaya wala akong naattract kaya dapat I'll just trap.

Poknat:     You made me irritable with that line Bez.

Bok2x:     Ok then tell me. Pangit ba ako.

Poknat:     (Didn't reply. Why? First: Poknat got irritated with the way Bok2x thinks. Second: Poknat didn't know how will she answer the last question.)

They say honesty is the best policy but sometimes truth hurts...

try moving on girl.. live your own life.. stop bugging us..

iniwan ka na.. di mo pa getz yun.. two years na..  my god!

ur still your desperate self..

i had myself check.. im not pregnant..

ive been feeling dizzy and feels like vomiting almost for a week..

although im relieved that im not pregnant.. (partly sad bec i miss being pregnant but hate the aftermath) i know that another sickness is causing this symptoms..

i just hope its just because i had no sleep for almost two weeks.. and when i get to rest.. all will be better..

mushygrey24

"Huwag mong hawakan kung alam mong bibitawan mo lang."

By: Bob Ong